Is family dispute resolution compulsory in Australia?

For most parenting matters, yes. Section 60I of the Family Law Act 1975 (Cth) generally requires a genuine attempt at family dispute resolution and a section 60I certificate before you can file. Exceptions apply, including urgency, family violence, child abuse and where a party is unable to participate effectively.

What happens if mediation fails?

The matter continues. For parenting, the mediator issues a section 60I certificate that allows you to file an application. For property, you proceed to or continue in court. Negotiations do not stop, and many matters settle later, including at a further mediation or at the door of the court.

Is what I say at mediation confidential?

Generally yes. Communications in family dispute resolution are confidential and are usually inadmissible in later proceedings, with limited exceptions including disclosures about a threat to a person’s life or health, or about child abuse. Ask your lawyer to explain the exceptions before you attend.

Do I need a lawyer at family law mediation?

Not in every case, but it usually helps, particularly in property matters or where there is a power imbalance. A lawyer can value the offers being made against the realistic trial range, spot problems in a proposed agreement, and convert what is agreed into consent orders or a binding financial agreement on the day.

Family law

Five conversations to have before your family law mediation

Published 27 February 2023 · Updated 28 February 2023

Why preparation matters

Mediation is a significant event in a separation. It can happen early, but more often it comes after months of gathering documents, taking advice and sometimes attending court.

By the time you get there, a great deal is riding on one day, and the decisions you make will be final. Preparing properly reduces the pressure, lets your lawyer do their job, and gives you a framework for judging an offer while you are sitting in the room.

1. What will actually happen on the day

Very few people outside the profession attend more than one mediation in their life. Most never attend any. So the process is likely to be unfamiliar.

Most lawyers will run you through it as a matter of course. If yours has not, ask. Useful questions include:

Who is the mediator, have you worked with them before, and what are they like?
Who speaks first, and do I have to say anything at all?
Will we be in the same room, or in separate rooms with the mediator moving between us?
Can I ask for a break, and how often?
What does a good outcome look like here?
How long is the day likely to run?

Anything that fills in the picture of how the day will unfold makes you calmer and more focused when it matters.

2. Your costs, now and if you go to trial

Costs are a major part of any separation and they tend to be left until too late. Nobody negotiates well when they have just received a surprise.

Unless you already have a clear picture, ask two questions before mediation day:

How much have I spent in legal fees so far, including work done but not yet billed?
If this does not resolve at mediation, what is the likely additional cost to get to and through a trial?

Those two numbers change how you assess an offer. They also let you put a value on the certainty of settling, which is real even though it does not appear on any balance sheet.

3. Your negotiables and non-negotiables

Litigation tends to push both sides to opposite ends of every question. If you want a particular asset, the other side’s lawyers will have argued at length why you should not have it.

But some of those items may not actually matter much to you. If you are close to indifferent about something, spending disproportionate time and money arguing over it is a poor trade, especially if it is genuinely valuable to your former partner. That item is currency.

Other things will be deal breakers. Sentimental items, pets, a minimum amount of spousal maintenance you need to live on. If something is critical to you, your lawyer needs to know why, so they can plan how to handle the discussion that will inevitably arise about it.

Sit down with your lawyer, or send a considered email, setting out what matters most, what matters least, and the reasoning. If something will be a hard sell on the day, you want to hear that beforehand rather than at 4pm in a mediation room.

4. The best and worst realistic alternatives

At some point in mediation you will probably be handed an offer that is acceptable but not good. Deciding on it requires knowing what happens if you say no.

So ask your lawyer, before the day:

What is the worst realistic outcome if this runs to trial?
What is the best realistic outcome if this runs to trial?

Family law outcomes sit in ranges, not at points, and no lawyer can tell you what a judge will do. But knowing the boundaries lets you place an offer somewhere between them and decide with context rather than instinct.

5. What happens if you do not settle

The answer depends on how far through the process you are when you mediate.

Most people want to finalise things and move on. If not settling means another 18 months of litigation, that belongs in the decision. If it means one more directions hearing and a trial date in four months, that is a very different calculation.

Deciding not to settle at mediation does not lock you into every remaining step. Negotiations continue, and many matters settle at the door of the court. Knowing the road ahead and its likely length is simply useful information.

Be prepared

Walk in having covered these five topics and you will be in a position to make sound decisions on the day, and to reach an outcome that lets you move on rather than one you spend a year second guessing.

If you have a mediation coming up, or you need help with a family law matter generally, contact our family dispute resolution team.

Last reviewed 3 August 2026 by the TWC Lawyers team. Queensland penalty units and court fees are indexed on 1 July each year. Check current figures before you rely on them, or ask us.